Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: FRIDAY, June 1, 1990 TAG: 9006020459
SECTION: SMITH MOUNTAIN TIMES PAGE: SM-4 EDITION: BEDFORD/FRANKLIN
SOURCE: Joe Michaels
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
The thing is that so far as mothers are concerned, anything wrong with their own brats has to be the result of bad influences. How could it be otherwise? What possibilities other than perfection are on display at home?
Well, now that I've moved to the country, more or less, I'm getting a little concerned about the example to the young set by birds. Yes. Birds.
No, this has nothing to do with the environment and whether the only thing surviving by the year Twenty Ought One will be the Death Watch beetle - I'll probably get around to that a few months from now. It has to do with morality and ethics and what the innocent mind of a 9-year-old like my grandson, Sasha, who will be visiting us soon, should be exposed to.
This, I am beginning to see, needs a certain amount of explanation. All right, then, listen up.
A couple of months ago we got ourselves a bird feeder. Not any kind of bird feeder, but a special one. It's plastic with several trays for holding bird seed and a funnel at the top for replenishing. It sticks to the window on suction cups and the part facing the window has one-way mirrors so that you can see the birds, but they can't see you. It's very clever and a lot of fun, though I should warn you that if you get one that replenishment funnel is going to get a lot of use and so is your wallet. When it comes to freeloading, birds are worse than a millionaire's relatives.
You are, I'm sure, familiar with the old saw about someone eating like a bird? Believe me, based on personal observation if people ate like the birds visiting our house lately we'd all look like Japanese Sumo wrestlers. And sloppy! I don't know how the rules of the dinner table worked in your house, but I can tell you that if I had stuffed seeds into my mouth the way birds around here do there would have been a lot of nights spent supperless in bed. But, I digress. It's not their feeder manners we're talking about here, it's their downright anti-social behavior.
Yes. It's springtime. And springtime does not bring out the best in male birds. The Earth is awakening. The flowers are putting forth blossoms. Bees are puttering around competing with butterflies for pollen, or whatever it is they're busy at.
Incidentally, we don't recommend your giving this piece to the kids to help them in their own nature studies, there might just possibly be an error or two in that area. What we're talking about here is The Big Picture, morality and bad examples for the young, and if you're looking for that kind of stuff you won't find a better example than birds in spring. Their behavior may be all well and good for the survival of the species, but that's where it stops.
First, the males get all duded up. The cardinal could almost blind you with the bright red of his coat. The gold finches have gone from a dull yellow to a brilliant, well, gold. And so it goes with all the guys putting on a show for the girls.
Which is all very fine, and watching them strut their stuff is fun. But their behavior! They are downright testy. A cowbird gets on the feeder and another wants a snack, too. There are three trays. Room for all. Plenty of goodies. But is this guy going to share? Forget it.
Finches, cute little things looking like someone splattered them with a brush dipped in red paint, turn into swaggering pirates. Pecking, nattering, carrying on. You think of pretty little birds like these as symbols of peace and harmony. Peace and harmony? Hah! Have you ever seen the behavior of male doves in mating season?
Anyway, as symbols of peace these guys are a fraud. They'd be more appropriate decorating the war banners of Attila the Hun. These birds are out for blood! Is this any way to behave in public? Is this the kind of thing you want your 9-year-old grandson exposed to? Why, these birds are acting like - people!
by CNB