Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: THURSDAY, August 5, 1993                   TAG: 9308060023
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: 1   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Medium

BETTER START SAVING FOR THAT SAFARI

This beats flowers and dinner and jewelry and stuff like that. You get this 16-day African safari for $3,490 a person. Airfare to Africa is not included.

There will be a physician along, although it isn't clear to me whether he accepts Medicare consignments or not.

Just wait until you go home and tell your little flower of the veldt that you're taking her on a safari. And right away she wants to smell your breath.

This man and woman from Illinois - real heartland America - are asking people to join them as they celebrate their golden wedding anniversary in the bush.

Now, is that sweet or what? Letting strangers intrude at such an emotional time in their lives, and for only a trifle over three grand a pop.

Oh, and the president of Luxury Adventure Safaris will get married during the trip, and you can come to the wedding. Boy, that gets the old heart to beating, doesn't it?

It really gets the blood to flowing when you know that you also are going to get "nights under canvas in the grand Hemingway style."

I assume this includes hyenas howling all night long and all the scotch whiskey you can drink and at least several women who strongly resemble Ava Gardner.

You also get a night at a "famous tree hotel," which frankly doesn't sound to me like a whole lot of fun.

You get to stay at the Mount Kenya Safari Club, too, and I'll bet right now there will be a Mount Kilimanjaro Cocktail. Instead of a small umbrella, it will be decorated with a replica of a frozen tiger.

And a word here about the jolly old Mount Kenya Safari Club. You're going to have to be dressed properly if you're to go there and talk about how simply smashing it was when the Empire was still in place.

I should say a $300 safari jacket with tailored shorts, knee socks and sturdy brogans would be acceptable. I don't know what your wife would wear to the club.

All of this, of course, brings up how much it's going to cost you to get the right clothes for this safari. I would say you could get by for about $1,500 apiece - which should include the right clothes for staying at that tree hotel and for the wedding.

I know. I know. Many of you wouldn't go to Vinton to attend a wedding, but let's get with the drill. OK?

I don't know about you, but I'm going to start saving right now for our safari.

I ought to be able to cut it by the time those nice people from Illinois celebrate their 65th anniversary.