Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: WEDNESDAY, August 18, 1993 TAG: 9308200078
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: Ben Beagle
DATELINE: LENGTH: Medium
This guy gets around. The last time I counted he'd been to the Midwest four times, and don't forget the day he herded all those tourists into the Rose Garden and talked to them, whether they liked it or not.
I personally think that a tourist in this country shouldn't be taken to the Rose Garden against his or her will, but let that go.
The other night when I was walking off leg cramps, it occurred to me that President Clinton might decide to visit some of the really common people - such as yours truly here.
This isn't far-fetched. You'll recall that Jimmy Carter did the same thing early in his presidency; before he was frightened by that attack rabbit.
If the Clintons decided to visit us, a number of things would happen immediately:
(a) I would wash the windows again, although I just did them in May.
(b) There would be a very big fight over repainting the entire house, inside and out, and I would win but not without a price.
(c) The supermarkets in the Roanoke Valley would notice unseasonal spurts in their total sales as the Beagles laid in some extra groceries - like those fancy crackers we can't afford most of the time.
The above certainties don't bother me. It's the fear of the unknown that worries me.
I mean, what about Mrs. Clinton? Do I pass the time of day idly? Or get out the bill for the last time I went to the emergency room for an allergy attack and ask her how the old health plan for all Americans is coming along?
She is a woman of substance, after all, and you certainly don't want to get into small talk - especially about who does her hair.
I personally would like to avoid whoever it is that does the president's hair, but what would I talk to him about?
I don't jog or go to fast-food places very often. I've never been anywhere near a blow dryer.
I guess I could get serious and ask him to stop fooling around with Medicare or get out the checkbook to show him that we're making those sacrifices he wanted from everybody.
I'd probably just ask where he gets his suits. Say what you will about this guy, he looks good in his suits - although the same can't be said for his jogging outfits.
I hope the Clintons never visit, but what can you do if the president wants to drop in?
The White house should be decent enough to give me some lead time for the windows.
by CNB