
                         Roanoke Times
                 Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.

DATE: FRIDAY, December 3, 1993                   TAG: 9312030405
SECTION: EXTRA                    PAGE: 1   EDITION: METRO 
SOURCE: Wendi Gibson Richert
DATELINE:                                 LENGTH: Short

STRAIGHT OUT OF MAYBERRY

Sure, there are plenty of self-help guides spilling off bookstore shelves. But there's probably not one quite like ``Barney Fife's Guide to Life, Love and Self-defense'' (The Summit Group, $9.95).

America's favorite deputy has issued his own 170-page hardcover book on his secrets of success. Relatively speaking, of course.

What qualifies the by-the-book Mayberry deputy to dish out advice? Especially someone who had to keep his only bullet in his shirt pocket to prevent any mishaps with his sidearm ``Old Roscoe''? In his own words, ``There's a little hayseed in all of us. Some of us just cover it up better than others.''

Consider Barney uncovered.

Now, consider Barney - on law enforcement: ``Sure is good to be doing a capacity business. Both cells filled up.''

Barney on character: ``It wouldn't do for me to stop someone with allspice on my breath.''

Barney on life: ``I replaced the pea in the whistle, but I ain't gonna charge you for it.''

Barney on friendship: ``Show me a man who'll help unclog your septic system, and I'll show you a friend.''

Barney on Andy: ``Andy, you'll never be lonely as long as I'm around.''

And with this new tome, written by brothers Len and John Oszustowicz of Eldred, Pa., you'll never be lonely again, either. Unless you decide to send Barney's ``tried and true'' fill-in-the-blank love letters to your sweetheart - twice.

by CNB