Roanoke Times
Copyright (c) 1995, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SATURDAY, December 10, 1994 TAG: 9412140049
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: C12 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: MIKE MAYO
DATELINE: LENGTH: Long
First though, for the youngest videophiles, we have "There Goes a Boat." It's part of the KidVision Live Action series, a worthy effort to introduce youngsters to different parts of the world around them. Though the series is endorsed by all manner of prestigious and right-minded organizations, including the Coalition for Quality Children's Video, this entry struck me as thin and wimpy. And I suspect a lot of kids will agree.
Our hosts and narrators are Captain Dave and Captain Becky, two moronically cheerful adults who act like refugees from a game show. They show us several different ships and boats - tugboat, container ship, submarine - but the only one they explore with any enthusiasm is the cruise ship. Surprise, surprise. The others get little more than a brief glance.
Any boy or girl who wants to know exactly what a tugboat does and how it goes about its job won't find any answers here.
To be fair, the visuals are bright, and the pace is quick enough to keep the kiddies occupied for a half hour. But for those old enough to have developed a real curiosity about ships and boats, a trip to the library will be a lot more rewarding.
Many of the same criticisms could be made about "Kids Love Trains." It too shows different types of trains - passenger, freight, subway - without explaining how they work. The visual images range from some striking shots of a snow plow mounted on an engine to pointless footage of tykes playing on an old caboose, the video equivalent of home movies.
Again, for older kids who have a real interest in trains, try the library, or a four-volume video documentary on the subject, "Locomotion: The Amazing World of Trains." Structured like Ken Burns' "Baseball," it may be too detailed for some children, but that's for kids and their parents to decide.
Two new Christmas programs feature familiar characters. Thomas the Tank Engine is back in "Thomas' Christmas Party and Other Favorite Stories." The two stories about Christmas are new. The other six are from older tapes. As fans know, these live-action animated tales are simply told with strong but unobtrusive morals. George Carlin's gruff, expressive narration counterbalances the stories' inherent sweetness.
"Raggedy Ann and Andy: The Christmas Adventure" is a conventional cartoon, first broadcast in 1988. It's quickly paced and imaginative with dragons, wizards, elves, pixies and the like. The animation is OK. Though I wasn't able to field-test these two with the target audience, I suspect they'll be hits.
Turning to more conventional video fare for older kids (and adults), we find two comedies.
"Ernest Goes To School" is, without question, the finest film vehicle for Jim Varney's Ernest P. Worrell, the commercial character turned leading man, or something to that effect.
This time out, Ernest is the janitor of Chippewa Falls High School. In his efforts to close the school, the evil superintendent demands that all employees earn their diplomas. Under normal circumstances that would be impossible for Ernest, but two mad scientists decide to use him as a guinea pig in their experiments. The "Sub-Atomic Brain Accelerator" turns him into a Worrellian Carl Sagan.
Most of the laughs come from pure Three-Stooges slapstick and Varney's patented comedic shtick. In his previous films, most recently "Ernest Rides Again," he has had poor to mixed results. This one is much more inventive and coherent, making better use of Varney's talents. It's everything an Ernest fan could ask for, and everything that drives the rest of the world crazy.
As the title suggests, "Tammy and the T-Rex" is aimed at the same teen audience that made "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" a modest hit a few year ago. The silly plot has to do with a cute high school girl (Denise Richards) whose boyfriend (Paul Walker) has his brain transplanted into a robot T-Rex by yet another mad scientist (Terry Kiser).
The tone of the film doesn't quite match the story. It's about as violent and sexually suggestive as it could be this side of an R rating. The low-budget effects are all right. The producers used the same critter that was featured in "Carnosaur" and "Dinosaur Island," so the proceedings have a certain familiarity. Genre veteran Stewart Raffill does his usual yeoman's work behind the camera. Acceptable entertainment for fans.
Next week: Christmas videos and other stuff!
New releases
Belle Epoque ***
Starring Ariadna Gil, Maribel Verdu, Miriam Diaz-Aroca, Penelope Cruz, Jorge Sanz, Fernando Fernan Gomez. Directed by Fernando Trueba. Columbia TriStar. 107 min. Rated R for subject matter, strong language (subtitled), brief nudity, violence.
Like "Four Weddings and a Funeral" and "Like Water for Chocolate," this import spins out a romantic story of sex, love and marriage. It's a real crowd-pleaser that won an Oscar for Best Foreign Film last year. The main ingredients are a naive young man, four beautiful sisters, their understanding father and a big country house in Spain, 1931. Delightful.
Blown Away: **1/2
Starring Jeff Bridges, Tommy Lee Jones, Suzy Amis, Lloyd Bridges. Directed by Stephen Hopkins. MGM/UA. 120 min. Rated R for violence, strong language.
Comparisons to last summer's other bomb thriller, "Speed" are inevitable. Where that sleeper hit is a fast-paced, hip West coast thrill ride, this one is slower, focused more at character with a strong East Coast (Boston) sensibility. As he did in "Under Siege," Tommy Lee Jones steals the film as the maddest mad bomber ever.
THE ESSENTIALS:
There Goes a Boat * A-plus Vision. 35 min. Unrated, contains no conventionally objectionable material.
Kids Love Trains *1/2 Atlas. 30 min. Unrated, contains no objectionable material.
Locomotion ** A&E Home Entertainment. 200 min. Unrated, contains no objectionable material.
Thomas' Christmas Party and Other Favorite Stories *** QFE Home Entertainment. 42 min. Unrated, contains no objectionable material.
Raggedy Ann and Andy: The Christmas Adventure **1/2 FoxVideo. 25 min. Unrated, contains no objectionable material.
Ernest Goes To School *** Monarch. 89 min. Rated PG for comic violence.
Tammy and the T-Rex ** Imperial. 82 min. Rated PG-13 for language, violence, some sexual material.
by CNB