ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Monday, November 25, 1996 TAG: 9611260013
SECTION: EXTRA PAGE: 1 EDITION: METRO
COLUMN: BEN BEAGLE
SOURCE: BEN BEAGLE
I had hoped not to become desperate enough for column material to tell you about this story that appeared a month or so ago in The Wall Street Journal.
But these are generally times of desperation and I'm going to tell you about these lockets you probably won't want to rush right out and buy.
They aren't going to be as popular as your average Christmas Barbie.
These aren't the lockets we have come to know and love - holding the curl of a loved one or a quaint picture of Grandpa and Grandma Twilliger at or about the time of the Oklahoma land rush.
What we are talking about here is a locket holding at least a part of the ashes of a dear departed person.
The people who invented these things say wearing them around your neck is a good way to cope with grief. I hope it's all right if some of us merely cry.
These little pendants come in heart shapes, cylinders and tear drops. They also come with or without diamonds.
I guess most people would settle for the teardrops.
This is America, pal, and there are two places you can get these things.
This outfit in Wisconsin has been selling El Cheapo versions since 1992 - at $150 to $800. Which is a rare example of bad news not traveling fast.
Mercifully, I don't know how to get in touch with them.
Maybe they have an 800 number. Or a catalogue.
There is also a funeral home owner - in Aurora, Ill., of all places - who is in the business a lot bigger than that. His graveyard jewelry will be selling for $1,900 to $10,000.
They will be sold by participating undertakers, who may argue - with some logic - that the price isn't so bad when you consider that this way you don't need a big bronze job for Uncle Titus.
The Journal quoted Mary Lou Cook, who has written a book about grief:
"There are certain people who would feel really good about having the ashes of their loved one accompany them all the time."
Come on.
In the shower? Doing the macarena?
I suspect she may be right if we are talking about people with personalities like, say, Dracula or the Phantom of the Opera.
Or Edgar Allan Poe or Stephen King.
Or most of the cast from "Night of the Living Dead."
I'm sorry, Mary Lou. You sound like a very nice person and I used to know a girl with the same name, but I don't wear stuff around my neck.
And right now, fortunately, I don't have an ash to my name.
LENGTH: Medium: 53 lines KEYWORDS: 2DAby CNB