ROANOKE TIMES
Copyright (c) 1996, Roanoke Times
DATE: Thursday, December 26, 1996 TAG: 9612260068
SECTION: VIRGINIA PAGE: A-1 EDITION: METRO
SOURCE: BETTY HAYDEN SNIDER STAFF WRITER
THE TUCKERS DECIDED to marry at the Ronald McDonald House because they have been staying there while doctors treat their premature baby.
Bells were ringing at Ronald McDonald House Christmas Eve - not the kind on Santa's sleigh, but wedding bells for a young Clifton Forge couple.
Bobby Tucker and Connie Neal, both 19, waited anxiously shortly before the 8 o'clock ceremony.
This was to be their Christmas gift to each other, something they both have wanted for several years. The timing finally seemed right, with their 1-month-old son, Austin Nathaniel, about to be released from the hospital after being born prematurely.
They had wanted to get married before the baby was born, but his early arrival derailed those plans, not the first time something prevented them from marrying.
Bobby and Connie met in the eighth grade, started dating in high school, then broke up for a year. After that, Bobby had a tattoo with Connie's name on it removed from his arm.
Love brought them back together, they said.
In September, he tattooed Connie's initials across the knuckles of his left hand.
"I think they make a pretty good couple," said Paul Neal, Connie's father. "Everybody's got their ups and downs."
Paul Neal and his wife, Phyllis, were sitting in the living room of Ronald McDonald House a half hour before the ceremony with Bobby's older brother, Donnie, who lives in Roanoke.
Connie called her parents Monday and told them about the wedding. Bobby's parents couldn't make it to the ceremony.
At first, Bobby and Connie were set to drive to Clifton Forge for the ceremony, but Ronald McDonald House's afternoon manager, Yvonne Wilhelm, suggested they get married at the house, Bobby said.
Wilhelm got to know Bobby and Connie quite well because she works in the afternoons, she said.
"It's a shift where you really get in tune with their emotions," Wilhelm said. "They've seen their babies, and it's either good news or bad news."
The couple have been staying at the house, a Tudor mansion on South Jefferson Street, since December. Parents of hospitalized children can stay at the house for $15 a night, or for free if they can't afford it.
When Bobby and Connie came to the house, their son, Austin, was still being treated for the gastroschesis he was born with Nov.24. About one in 20,000 babies is born with gastroschesis, where part of the baby's intestines protrudes from the abdomen and is only covered by a thin membrane.
The condition has been surgically corrected, and Austin should go home this week from Carilion Roanoke Community, so Bobby and Connie wanted to get married before they take him to their home in Callaghan.
Although there wasn't much time to get ready for the wedding, the occasion became as traditional as it could be under the circumstances.
Paul Neal had the mixed feelings that most fathers have: He was sorry to see her go, but said, "I'm glad to see her getting married because that's what she needs."
Connie also needed an attendant, so she asked Wilhelm, the afternoon manager at the house, to be matron of honor. Wilhelm arranges bridal bouquets for friends and family, so she took care of Connie's flowers and informally directed the wedding.
Bobby asked his brother Donnie to be best man. Donnie, 26, who works at the Shoney's on Electric Road, said he always thought he would get married and have children before his little brother.
Alan Brittle, executive director of the McDonald house, and Wilhelm lined up the minister, the cake and other goodies for the reception.
Brittle happily came back to work Tuesday night to act as photographer and videographer at the house's first wedding since it opened in 1984.
The couple decided to exchange vows in front of the fireplace in the candlelit, oak-paneled living room. The dozen or so guests, except for a few family members, were other families with sick children who met Bobby and Connie at the house.
Just before the ceremony began, the minister, Dr. Vern Jordahl, a chaplain and teacher at the College of Health Sciences, introduced himself to some of the guests.
"It's a great story. This little baby is fighting for his life, and they're giving him a real family to go home to," Jordahl said. "This makes Christmas Eve even more pleasurable."
Almost precisely on time, the couple's favorite song, "Always," came on over the house's loudspeaker, the cue for Wilhelm, then Connie, to walk down the grand, winding staircase.
Instead of a flowing white gown, Connie wore an above-the-knee black dress with a lace overlay. She chose black because it signifies, "burying the past and giving birth to the future," she said.
Bobby wore a blue button-down shirt, black jeans and tennis shoes. He had a silk carnation pinned to his shirt. Both stumbled a little on their vows - Bobby giggled a few times and Connie forgot her lines once - but Bobby didn't hesitate when the minister turned away without telling him to kiss his bride.
Afterward, the customary wedding photos were taken, and the couple cut the cake. They were considering Subway, one of the few restaurants still open, for a post-nuptial dinner.
Mr. and Mrs. Tucker said they would spend their honeymoon at the hospital.
Once Austin is home, Bobby will work on getting his GED and finding a steady job, maybe as an auto mechanic. He had been working odd jobs until the baby was born.
Connie isn't sure what she will do right now, but she knows where she would like to be in five years.
"I hope to have been in college and made something of myself."
For now, Bobby and Connie are content.
"I couldn't be happier," Connie said. "I wouldn't change anything."
LENGTH: Long : 110 lines ILLUSTRATION: PHOTO: NHAT MEYER/Staff. 1. Dr. Vern Jordahl conducts theby CNBwedding of Bobby Tucker and Connie Neal. Bobby's brother Donnie
served as best man. color. 2. Bobby Tucker and Connie Neal share a
moment at the beginning of their wedding ceremony as Yvonne Wilhelm,
manager of Ronald McDonald House, looks on.