THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1994, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: SUNDAY, June 26, 1994 TAG: 9406230155
SECTION: CAROLINA COAST PAGE: 03 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: Ford Reid
DATELINE: 940626 LENGTH: Medium
Heretofore, the Marshalls have been best known for issuing commemorative coins that are advertised on late night television, but that is about to change.
{REST} It seems the government there just built itself a grand new building, something which governments are wont to do. Then the president decided that the glory of the new building was being insulted by the shabby appearance of some of the people doing business in it.
So the government declared that any man entering the building must wear a necktie.
The problem is, not many of the men living in the Marshall Islands own neckties. I guess they don't celebrate Father's Day there.
Anyway, a critical shortage of neckties developed almost immediately. The few stores that had them in stock sold out immediately.
According to The Wall Street Journal, men who had to do business in the government building traded ties back and forth.
Think about it for a moment and try to imagine some poor guy waiting outside for his friend to leave the building so that he can wear the tie for a few minutes. And all of that so that he could go inside and pay his taxes.
Talk about adding insult to injury.
I think it is time we started a relief effort: Ties for the Marshall Islands.
I am not entirely against ties. I think they serve a useful purpose once or twice a year. It is a good thing to wear one to a wedding or a funeral as a way of saying ``This day is different from the rest.''
There used to be a few places where no one ever wore a tie.
On vacation at the beach, my father once decided to go to church and thought he needed a tie to do that. He asked the fellow who owned the motel if he could borrow one.
The poor guy was certain he had one but after searching for a couple of hours he gave up and started calling his friends. After about a dozen calls, he found an outlandish flower print tie that my father wore to church.
He was, of course, the only man in the building wearing a tie.
The Outer Banks used to be one of those tie-less places. Oh, sure, now and then you saw a lawyer in Manteo wearing one on court day, but he was probably wearing socks, too.
For the most part, Outer Bankers went about their daily business unencumbered by a colorful noose around the neck.
That has changed.
In the past 10 years there has been a disturbing trend toward men wearing ties on the Outer Banks.
I won't mention any names - or even specific occupations prone toward showy dressing - but you know who you are.
I think we have an opportunity to here to catch two fish on one hook.
What I'm suggesting is that we return to the glorious Outer Banks tradition of shunning ties. At the same time, we can help the poor Marshall Islanders survive until their president comes to his senses.
Take off that tie right now, pack it up and send it to the Marshall Islands. We will all be better off for it.
by CNB