THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc. DATE: Tuesday, April 30, 1996 TAG: 9604300031 SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E7 EDITION: FINAL COLUMN: VIDEOMATIC SOURCE: BY CRAIG SHAPIRO, STAFF WRITER LENGTH: Long : 139 lines
LIFE SURE must be sweet way out there on the Satellite of Love. Just you and a couple of smart-alecky robots sitting around all day making wisecracks about bad movies. And people tune in faithfully to hear what you say!
Of course, it's not so bad down at Ground Zero. There aren't any robots on staff - none as hip as Crow and Tom Servo, anyway - but we see some stinkers. If moms count, we have a devoted audience, too.
No question, though, ``Mystery Science Theater 3000'' rules. A TV show about watching movies? With the new big-screen feature (it's yet to play here), you've got a movie about a TV show about watching movies. All that's left is videos about a TV show about watching movies.
Enter Rhino, which today brings out the first titles in its ``MST'' series - ``The Amazing Colossal Man,'' ``Mitchell'' and ``The Cave Dwellers.'' They list for $19.95, and feature co-creator Joel Hodgson. (We point that out because his replacement, head writer Mike Nelson, isn't nearly as funny.)
The video series makes sense. As any ``MST'' fan will tell you, the cracks - the Philadelphia Inquirer described them as ``a nonstop liberal arts and pop-culture quiz'' - fly by so quickly it's impossible to catch them all.
Which is why God made rewind buttons.
Consider this from ``The Amazing Colossal Man,'' the first film about ``a giant mutated guy that doesn't star Ted Cassidy or Richard Kiel'':
Actress: ``Why did this have to happen to him?''
Actor: ``Things like this just happen. It doesn't have to have a reason.''
Tom Servo: ``Oh, he's a Calvinist.''
The 1957 movie preaches the standard A-bomb warning. Col. Glen Manning is exposed to a plutonium blast and grows, grows, grows. When he awakes in the hospital, dazed, confused and bald, the ``MST'' crew works in every reference from Marlon Brando and Mr. Clean to Sinead O'Connor and Midnight Oil's Peter Garrett.
Scientists trying to save him experiment on rabbits, and someone pipes up with, ``Time to die, Avon calling.'' The colonel complains, ``I'm growing so fast I'm giving myself a wedgie.''
But our favorite exchange is between Crow and Tom Servo as they're watching stock WWII aerial footage.
``What are we watching, the Arts & Entertainment network?''
``The All-Hitler Channel, you mean.''
We could go on, but our editor, usually a nice lady, is getting crabby about deadlines. Pick up a tape. Pick up two.
VIDEO FIRSTS: There's a reason you haven't seen Bette Davis' ``The Nanny'' and ``The Anniversary'' on video. Until today, they've never been released. FoxVideo, $19.98.
PRICED TO GO: Columbia TriStar has repriced the spooky ``Dolores Claiborne'' at $19.95. ``Past Midnight,'' ``Children of the Night,'' ``Severed Ties,'' ``Mindwarp,'' ``The Tingler'' and ``Night of the Living Dead'' (1990) are $14.95.
Orion is asking $14.98 for ``Flesh + Blood,'' ``Yellowbeard,'' ``Haunted Honeymoon,'' ``Absolute Beginners'' and ``Just Between Friends.''
Buena Vista is asking $19.99 for ``While You Were Sleeping,'' ``Miami Rhapsody,'' ``Jefferson in Paris,'' ``Mad Love,'' ``A Pyromaniac's Love Story,'' ``Queen Margot,'' ``Ready to Wear'' and the superb trilogy, ``Blue,'' ``White'' and ``Red.''
TOP TAPES (in Billboard):
Sales: ``Babe,'' ``Pulp Fiction,'' ``The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh,'' ``Pocahontas,'' ``Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls''
Rentals: ``Braveheart,'' ``Seven,'' ``Babe,'' ``The Usual Suspects,'' ``Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls''
Robyn Redux
It's a shame there is still a need for films like ``White Man's Burden.'' The makers of the classic ``The Defiant Ones'' probably hoped the racial prejudices they explored in 1958 would have become completely antiquated.
Daring when it was released, the movie depicts the plight of two convicts, one black and one white, forced to confront their own prejudices as they escape from a chain gang while shackled together. Sidney Poitier and Tony Curtis are memorable as the fugitives. As they struggle to survive, they come to a mutual respect.
Both actors and director Stanley Kramer received Oscar nominations; the film was a best-picture candidate, too. Screenwriters Nathan E. Douglas and Harold Jacob Smith won a statuette. But more importantly, ``The Defiant Ones'' still has the power to provoke meaningful dialogue.
The Couch Report
``Money Train'' (Columbia TriStar, 1995). Give Wesley and Woody anvils, and this 'toon would have it all. They walk through their roles as foster brothers and transit cops - one a stand-up guy, the other a hustler. There isn't much action until the big heist, leaving most of the running time to rehashed ``White Men Can't Jump'' schtick. As cartoons go, it's OK. Videomatic says: C-
(CAST: Wesley Snipes, Woody Harrelson, Robert Blake, Jennifer Lopez. RATED: R for language, violence, situations, brief nudity; 110 mins.)
``White Man's Burden'' (HBO, 1995). Racial inequity is a timely issue, one that is too complex to distill into 90 minutes. Still, this daring drama is to be applauded, even if its grasp falls just short of its reach. The ``What if?'' premise reverses the power structure, but viewers are more likely to be touched by John Travolta's passionate performance as a fired factory worker and the film's faithful, if grim, conclusion. Videomatic says: A-
(CAST: John Travolta, Harry Belafonte, Kelly Lynch. RATED: R for language, violence, themes; 90 mins.)
``How to Make an American Quilt'' (MCA/Universal, 1995). Watching the gifted Winona Ryder work with a fine ensemble of veteran actresses is a treat in itself. She's a grad student getting cold feet about marriage. As the Grass Quilting Bee recount their bittersweet experiences, their patchwork stories create a beautifully detailed and comforting whole. Videomatic says: A-
(CAST: Winona Ryder, Anne Bancroft, Ellen Burstyn, Alfre Woodard, Maya Angelou, Jean Simmons, Kate Nelligan. RATED: PG-13 for language, situations, brief nudity, pot-smoking; 117 mins.)
``Murdered Innocence'' (Columbia TriStar, 1995). In some tongue-in-cheek way, this thriller clicks - despite its Western Union script and shaky acting. Maybe it's the ``Blood Simple'' and ``One False Move'' pretensions. A young man, a boy when his mother was murdered, returns to the scene. He's not alone. Jason Miller is the weary cop in the middle. Videomatic says: C
(CAST: Jason Miller, Fred Carpenter, Jacqueline Macario, Gary Aumiller. RATED: R for violence, language, situations, off-screen rape; 88 mins.)
Also: ``The Show,'' the hip-hop/rap concert film featuring Dr. Dre and Naughty By Nature (R); the wild South African comedy `Yankee Zulu'' (PG); ``Daens,'' a 1992 foreign-film Oscar nominee about worker unrest in Belgium (unrated), and the Turner original ``Kissinger and Nixon'' (unrated)
Vids for Kids
``Tom and Huck'' (Disney, 1995). We've got the heroes - billed as Disney's ``Bad Boys'' - Injun Joe, Becky Thatcher and Muff Potter. Devilish Tom dupes his pals into painting Aunt Polly's fence, too. But instead of an adaptation, Mark Twain's classic is a watered-down adventure that is too violent for its rating. On top of that, Jonathan Taylor Thomas doesn't have a clue as to Tom Sawyer's character. (Wednesday) Videomatic says: D
(CAST: Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Brad Renfro, Eric Schweig, Amy Wright. RATED PG: for tension, violence; 91 mins. $19.99.)
Also: ``Imagine That!'' ($12.98), new to Sony Wonder's ``Sesame Street'' line, and two tapes from TV's ``The Masked Rider'' ($12.95 each, Saban)
Next Tuesday: ``Three Wishes,'' ``Carrington,'' ``It Takes Two,'' ``Reckless,'' ``Dead Cold'' ILLUSTRATION: RYSHER ENTERTAINMENT
John Travolta, left, and Harry Belafonte co-star in the daring
drama, ``White Man's Burden.''
by CNB