THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Friday, August 9, 1996 TAG: 9608090054
SECTION: DAILY BREAK PAGE: E1 EDITION: FINAL
SOURCE: By JENNIFER McMENAMIN, STAFF WRITER
LENGTH: 95 lines
PREPARING FOR COLLEGE can be a bummer when you're kind of, well, clueless about what to expect. But a new self-help book by the Princeton Review can provide awesome tips and cool suggestions on how to get yourself totally psyched for your college experience - and sound completely different from the rest of those Generation Xers wandering our country's college campuses.
The 25-year-old authors' attempt at college-aged lingo is a little out of date. Authors Melanie and Joseph Sponholz, who met in college and are now married, use words like ``duh,'' ``cool,'' ``psyched,'' ``sucks'' and ``shafted'' more times in 169 pages than you'll ever hear from any one college student. They even go so far as to refer to date rape as ``a total bummer of a topic.''
Presumably, the goal was to speak the ``slang-uage'' of the readers. The result, however, is annoying word choices that often mask the content: some very unnecessary - and condescending - explanations of things like majors and class credits mixed in with some very good tips about what to expect from college.
Broken into nine chapters, the ``College Companion: Attaining Academic and Social Nirvana'' ($15) offers tips and real-life stories on everything from moving to campus and dealing with a roommate, to getting a job, living in an alcohol-saturated environment, registering for classes and studying for exams.
They begin this heavenly journey with things to consider before you move a single belonging into your new and way-too-small room.
``Bring the larger stereo,'' the authors suggest. ``Yes, that's right, the larger. First, you can use the speakers as a coffee table. Second, a large part of social life revolves around music in college. You'll be able to rock the dorm.''
The speakers' capacity also can smooth out kinks in community relations.
``Your next-door neighbor dribbles a basketball at 5 a.m.?'' they write. ``No problem, a little 100 decibel Hendrix at midnight should drown him out or get him to quiet down. Of course, this may not make you the most well-liked person in the dorm.''
Among the other dorm necessities, the Sponholzs suggest a corkscrew and bottle opener, hammer and screwdriver, power strips and extension cords. The last two are an absolute must. With only four outlets in a room for two people, these devices multiply the power supply, making it possible to simultaneously plug in stereos, TV, halogen lamps, hair dryers, curling irons, desk lamps, alarm clocks, lava lamps, Christmas lights, computers, printers and modems.
The authors provide great tips about documenting payments to the bursar's office, participating in orientation activities no matter how hokey they seem, cramming stuff into all corners of a dorm room, finding a job, attending class and studying for exams. They even include a sample essay test to acclimate new students with collegiate exam questions.
In fact, they thrive when it comes to bulleted lists of things to do when managing a heavy work load, planning a schedule to avoid such a burden or even pulling an all-nighter when there is no other option.
But the advice falls short when it comes to less tangible topics, such as college courses.
In one section - tagged ``I've Got To Take WHAT?'' - the authors explain the logistics of degree-granting institutions, which seems unnecessary. ``First things first,'' they write. ``College usually require that a student take a specified total amount of classes, a.k.a. the graduation requirements, in order to get a degree.'' After defining the different degrees available, the authors continue, ``Another way schools decide when to award degrees to students is to keep track of their credit hours or credits.''
Students who read this book presumably will be headed to college in a few months. They will have read information about or visited the school, completed an admissions application and received an acceptance letter. They and/or their parents will have handed over a rather large chunk of money to attend this school. Therefore, they probably know a little something about what they will be getting in exchange for the money now missing from their checking account.
That would make explanations like, ``Essentially, your major is the topic in college that you have chosen to specialize in'' a little superfluous.
And while their approach to partying and excessive drinking is helpful without being preachy, the authors' approach to reporting illegal activities is unrealistic.
``At the outset, you should keep in mind that if your roommate is conducting any type of illegal activity in your dorm room, you're likely to be involved if they get caught,'' they write, encouraging students to turn in their roommates.
``Do you really want to find yourself in the Dean's office trying to explain that even though the phone rang at all hours of the day and night with the caller saying `Pinto says put $100 on Dallas,' you had no idea of what was going on?''
From stories my friends shared with me, I contend it would be much easier to explain such a phenomena to an administrator than to deal with the wrath of a roommate who knows you turned him or her in. Housing officials are not going to transfer you or your roommate the same day you inform them of your roomie's gambling or drug problem. And in the meantime, you become the brunt of the roommate's anger as he or she is investigated for illegal activities.
Overall, if you're really nervous about college and don't have older friends who can show you the ropes, I'd recommend skimming the book. Just remember that it's only one opinion and there are a million resources on campus to explain - in person - how to write a paper or sign up for classes or avoid STDs. And in most cases, that advice is free. MEMO: Jennifer McMenamin is a student at the University of Maryland and
a summer intern at The Virginian-Pilot. by CNB