THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Monday, August 19, 1996 TAG: 9608160007
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A6 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Letter
LENGTH: 47 lines
Regarding ``Kids in trouble'' (Commentary section, July 14): Most people seem to agree that building more jails and adding more counselors in jails and in schools may be helpful.
However, surely, we must realize that the best way to reduce crime is not by increasing remedial programs but by striving to eliminate the need for them.
We often see parents of new babies cooing over their infants; yet we see many parents of toddlers and teenagers being rude to their children and speaking about them as if they would rather not be bothered. We see toddlers and teenagers being rude back. We see unhappiness and the roots of the ills of society.
We must remind each other that having a baby means having a baby for a few months; having a toddler for several years; having a pre-adolescent for several years, a teenager for several years and then an adult for the rest of life.
Having a baby means not only that the life of the parent will change forever but that the lives of everyone the ``baby'' touches as he grows will change in some way.
The parent influences the young child with every word said to him, every action taken with him, every decision made for him or with him. The influences either lead the child toward appreciating life or toward feeling unloved and unhappy. The unloved, unhappy child is likely to lash out at society.
Naomi Griffith, an Alabama native, spoke in Norfolk several months ago at a conference sponsored by Child Abuse Prevention Services. She said that her situation when she was a child would be considered well below the poverty level. Her father was a migrant worker who moved often. Her mother finished only the seventh grade. Her mother loved her deeply and let her know it.
Naomi Griffith is now the executive director of the national organization Parents And Children Together. Her voice choked with emotion as she said, ``When people think that poor people can't cherish their children, I resent it. It does not matter who you are, where you live or what you have. What matters is what is in your heart.''
As the job of parenting is elevated, as we all realize that it may be the most important thing a human being ever does and as we all try to help society by taking personal responsibility for helping the person that we add to the world be the best he can be, civilization should prosper. We need not wonder what to do in order to help.
EMILY SLINGLUFF
Virginia Beach, July 30, 1996 by CNB