THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1996, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Saturday, October 12, 1996 TAG: 9610120001
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A15 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: OPINION
SOURCE: KERRY DOUGHERTY
LENGTH: 74 lines
Watching politics is a little like driving by a gruesome car wreck. You want to look, but you try to keep your eyes fixed on the road. Eventually you can't resist - you stare at the wreckage and wince.
Which explains why on Sunday night and Wednesday night many of us with better things to do were glued to our television sets watching the spartan, stiff and carefully choreographed shows that pass for political debate in this country.
Secretly, we were hoping to see a car wreck. But what we saw instead was civilized discourse.
In fact, civility and society's lack of it were the underlying themes of both debates. On vice presidential night moderator Jim Lehrer addressed the issue directly. He asked the candidates to comment specifically on the Baltimore Oriole's Roberto Alomar and what had happened generally to common civility in America.
Talk about lost opportunities. Both Gore and Kemp missed the mark when they responded politely, but politically. Rampant capitalism could solve incivility said Kemp. Clinton's bridge to the future would help, countered Gore.
Why didn't Jack Kemp, the ultimate jock, point out that a pitcher could draw 10-day suspension for throwing a spit ball while Alomar pulled just five days for spitting in the face of an umpire?
Why didn't Gore castigate Orioles majority owner Peter Angelos for not benching Alomar?
Why didn't they both lament the effect such repulsive behavior has on society?
I had my own encounter with incivility last week. It occurred exactly one week and one day after Alomar spat upon John Hirschbeck and then blamed the whole incident on the umpire's lingering grief over the death of his son. I believe the person who so offended me must have been an Alomar fan.
Last Saturday morning I was driving my 6-year-old son to his piano lesson in the Lago Mar section of the city. We were traveling down Sandbridge Road, a narrow ribbon of asphalt with no margin for error, when I noticed a Jeep on my bumper. Right on my bumper. I checked my speedometer - 45, the speed limit. I turned into Lago Mar and the driver continued to tailgate. Had I been alone in the car I might have slammed on my brakes. My trusty old Trooper has 135,000 miles on the odometer and would have been none the worse for wear.
Common sense prevailed. I drove 25 miles per hour through the serene neighborhood. When I pulled into the piano teacher's driveway this man stopped behind me, rolled down his window and began to swear at me. He was angry because I had been driving too slow for his satisfaction.
This is a family newspaper and I can't repeat the words, although my son heard every one.
Again, had I been alone I might have made this Jeep-driving vermin rue the day he decided to get into a cussing match with a journalist. But my little boy was holding my hand, the birds were singing, the piano teacher was waiting.
I shook my head and said ``Sir, you must have a serious problem with women. I'm sorry for you.''
As he wheeled away from the curb I was awash in moral superiority - one of the underrated dividends of civil behavior.
Then I wondered how he felt. Did he feel manly and strong, having cursed a woman in front of her young son? Did he regret he hadn't shot me or punched me - or spit on me?
I could have called the authorities with his license number and description and had him offically reminded that curse and abuse is illegal in Virginia Beach.
But no court, no politician and no policeman can make a person behave civilly.
Fortunately for America, we now have a quartet of politicians fighting hard for the top two jobs in the Free World, but doing it in a civilized fashion.
They offer a refreshing antidote to Roberto Alomar and are a far cry from the days of Wilie Horton.
May it last through Election Day. MEMO: Ms. Dougherty is an editorial writer for The Virginian-Pilot. by CNB