THE VIRGINIAN-PILOT
Copyright (c) 1997, Landmark Communications, Inc.
DATE: Monday, January 13, 1997 TAG: 9701110010
SECTION: FRONT PAGE: A8 EDITION: FINAL
TYPE: Letter
LENGTH: 35 lines
Timothy K. Eppley's ``Loving lessons of adoption'' (letters, Jan. 4), which criticizes biological mothers who want to be reunited with children they gave up for adoption, struck a chord. I, too, am concerned about this increasingly common fad. I see a real danger to the children.
Many states, including Virginia and California, have laws on the books that potentially obligate adult children to support destitute parents. Virginia's law does not specifically exempt children who were given up for adoption from its provisions. If the biological parent(s) and children reunite later and establish regular contact, the children might find themselves liable under this law.
Knowing this, I wonder about the true motivations for biological parents to find their adopted-out children. In cases I've heard about, the mother continued to engage in irresponsible behavior, had more children, went on welfare and was old enough for her youngest child to have turned 18, causing her to lose her welfare benefits. She suddenly wants to find the child she gave up. Why?
Even in the absence of parental-support laws, that child could find himself/-herself subject to a guilt trip by the mother to give her money. Or the child could be suckered into signing agreements to pay her medical or nursing-home bills.
This analysis may seem cynical - but if I had been adopted and 30 years later my biological mother suddenly contacted me, I'd want to know why.
In my experience, a relative who gets in touch after years without contact usually bears bad news or wants something.
EDWIN KRAMPITZ JR.
Drewryville, Jan. 6, 1997